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Apple Reveals World’s First Pair of Smart Underwear

by Brianne Grianne O’Bannahan Esq. January 24, 2018 We’ve seen smart phones, glasses, speakers and televisions before. Those are as common as sand on a beach, but smart underwear? Leave it to Apple, folks, to introduce the world’s first revolutionary pair of smart unmentionables — and they are hitting shelves sooner than you think. Apple calls their groundbreaking underwear the […]

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Matt Lauer and Harvey Weinstein Partner to Open New Locked Room Game With a Twist

by Chauncey Bigbottoms III January 20, 2018 Surprise! Matt Lauer and Harvey Weinstein, with all of their newfound free time, have announced the opening of “Lock and Key,” a new locked room haunted house game with a twist. The dynamic duo’s creepy house will be an abandoned 4-bedroom 3-bath located somewhere in the middle of nowhere with good soundproofing and […]

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‘Urban Diet’ is the New Weight Loss Craze Sweeping the Nation

By Brianne Grianne O’Bannahan Esq. January 17, 2018 For anyone looking to shed pounds fast and prepare that sizzling beach bod for Spring Break in record time without expensive pills and messy surgery, there’s a new fad diet sweeping the nation, affectionately called “The Urban Diet” by the program’s creator, Chad Wellington Junior, a successful stockbroker and computer programmer. The […]

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LaVar Ball Insists His Unborn Daughter Was Snubbed at the Golden Globes, Blames Oprah

by Brianne Grianne O’Bannahan Esq. January 10, 2018 LaVar Ball is in an uproar in the wake of 2018’s Golden Globes awards, insisting that his unborn daughter, Lozenge Ball, should have won the award for Best Actress instead of Saoirse Ronan. LaVar declined to comment but a source close to Ball claims that the disgruntled would-be father blames Luke Walton, […]

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Trump Drops Savage Diss Track ‘Finger on the Button’. Your Move, Kim Jong-Un.

by Chauncey Bigbottoms III January 9, 2018 President Trump continues his bid for world domination by releasing “Finger on the Button”, the first single on his surprise debut album Drain the Swamp. Trump, who dubs himself T-Rump in the liner notes of the new record, says he recorded the album over the last two years in secret and the record […]

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Gary Busey Accuses Gary Busey of Sexual Misconduct

by Brianne Grianne O’Bannahan Esq. January 6, 2018 In the midst of the powerful, pervasive #metoo campaign, Gary Busey has come forward and accused, well, Gary Busey of sexual misconduct on a cold winter night back in 2016, well within the statute of limitations. The legendary, vaunted actor means to do something about it by bringing his experience into the […]

Netflix 0

The Ritual (Netflix) Fidget Review

What happens when four friends go hiking through the remote mountains of Sweden, as they honor one of their dead mates? The Ritual is a heart-pounding adventure — especially in its first three-quarters or so — which explores that very subject matter. And while the last portion of the movie doesn’t always hit home, it does little to detract from […]

Cinema 0

Blade Runner 2049 Fidget Review

Blade Runner 2049 paints a very grim, rainy picture of the near future — filled with extremely lifelike AI companions, flying cars, product advertisements that quite literally invade your personal space, and a race of hyper-repressed robots programmed for complete obedience, called replicants. Ryan Gosling plays Officer K, one such replicant. His job is to hunt down and “retire” other […]

Cinema 0

What We Do In The Shadows Fidget Review

Okay, okay, this released way back in 2014 but I just happened upon it the other night, and by the Lord of Darkness, I’m so glad I did. What We Do in the Shadows is a mockumentary about a group of vampires living as flatmates in New Zealand and their struggle to blend into normal society in order to, you […]

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The End of the F***ing World (Netflix) Fidget Review

With a name like The End of the F***ing World, you’d expect something a little different than the average Netflix offering, and with this show that’s exactly what you get. Apparently based on a comic book by Charles Forsman, the show tells the tale of two angsty teens each in the middle of their own respective identity crisis. James has […]

Netflix 0

The Punisher (Netflix) Season 1 Fidget Review

It’s difficult for most shows to maintain their momentum over the course of 13 episodes, and while The Punisher does have moments that feel a bit flat, Jon Bernthal’s performance as Frank Castle aka “The Punisher” is razor sharp and carries the show even at its lowest points. He brings the proper amount of torment and sadness to the role, […]

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New Details Emerge Around The Next Next Avengers Film

by Nick Beard January 8, 2018 Avengers: Infinity War is still four months away but details have already started to emerge around the next Avengers film, courtesy of the lead key grip of all the previous comic book films, who wished to remain anonymous. “It’s going to be amazing, man,” our source said, while surreptitiously attempting to contain an erection. […]

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Mindhunter (Netflix) Season 1 Fidget Review

To say Mindhunter is a killer show is not only punny — it’s also very true. Created by Joe Penhall and produced by the likes of Charlize Theron and David Fincher, the first season centers around the work of two FBI agents in the early days of criminal psychology (the term “serial killer” hasn’t even been coined yet). The dynamic […]

Cinema 0

Baby Driver Fidget Review

Like a botched bank robbery, I’m not sure what the hell went wrong here. Baby Driver has all the makings of a good piece of crime drama under the hood but ultimately fails to deliver a coherent, or even capable, movie. Edgar Wright has vision, I’ll give him that. The movie is full of vibrant colors and an excellent soundtrack, […]

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Best Movies of 2017!

Narrowing down the best movies of the year didn’t pose much of a challenge. I didn’t grow up on comic books and seeing as Hollywood is still in the middle of an intense love affair with the genre, it’s largely kept me out of the theaters for the past decade or so. My main problem with comic book movies stems […]

Video Games 0

Best Games of 2017!

2017 boasted an exciting (and overwhelming) amount of quality video games. So much so that my backlog is a constant source of mirth to my friends and family. But through the legion of titles, some bubbled to the top. Here’s my top 3 video games of 2017: #1 – Divinity Original Sin 2 (PC) Kickstarter darling and heir to the […]

Novel 0

Best Books of 2017!

2017 was full of great books and entertainment. Here’s my top 3 books of 2017, which I highly recommend if you haven’t had the pleasure of checking them out yet. #1 – Ill Will by Dan Chaon. This is not only Dan’s best novel to date, it’s his most layered and complex and reads like an ominous wall of storm […]

Cinema 0

The Last Jedi Fidget Review (2nd Viewing)

With my head canon and expectations effectively out of the way, I approached my second viewing of The Last Jedi in a different fashion than the first. I settled into my comfortable leather theater seat with more of an open, positive mindset and reminded myself to enjoy the ride, even though it does not line up with the way I […]

Cinema 0

The Last Jedi Fidget Review (1st Viewing)

The Last Jedi is a special beast — as special as the nipply sea beast that willingly supplies Luke with that magical green coffee he enjoys so much (see: his facial expression after he drinks it). It’s different, it’s surprising and it’s kind of repulsive all at once. The new space adventure takes place soon after the events of The […]

Sweets 0

Hershey’s Gold Fidget Review

Oh, my — Hershey’s released this gorgeous bar worldwide yesterday, December 1st, 2017, and I was able to track them down this morning (Target for anyone who is wondering). Anything caramelized is automatically on my radar. I don’t care if you draw out and brown the sugar in apples, onions, potatoes or, well… sugar, as is the case here. The […]

Novel 0

Ill Will by Dan Chaon Fidget Review

Satanic rituals (alleged), a kid who fancies himself a psychic vampire named Amy, some light incest, and a mysterious mass murder await you within the pages of this masterfully layered and executed novel of perception, deception and the soul-rending anguish only the young and lost can experience. In short, HBO needs to get in touch with Dan Chaon right away […]